sâmbătă, 30 mai 2009

The future's bright, the future's corporate

Welcome my son, welcome to the machine.
What did you dream? it's alright, we told you what to dream.

luni, 25 mai 2009

And another...

leapsa zic. de la Raluca :

00) Bolded the things I’ve done in the following list
01) Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02) Swam with wild dolphins
03) Climbed a mountain
04) Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05) Been inside the Great Pyramid
06) Held a tarantula
07) Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08) Said ‘I love you’ and meant it
09) Hugged a tree
10) Done a striptease
11) Bungee jumped
12) Visited Paris
13) Watched a lightning storm at sea
14) Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise
15) Seen the Northern Lights
16) Gone to a huge sports game
17) Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
18) Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19) Touched an iceberg
20) Slept under the stars
21) Changed a baby’s diaper
22) Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23) Watched a meteor shower
24) Gotten drunk on champagne
25) Given more than you can afford to charity
26) Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
27) Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28) Had a food fight
29) Bet on a winning horse
30) Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
31) Asked out a stranger
32) Had a snowball fight
33) Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34) Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
35) Held a lamb
36) Enacted a favorite fantasy
37) Taken a midnight skinny dip
38) Taken an ice cold bath
39) Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40) Seen a total eclipse
41) Ridden a roller coaster
42) Hit a home run
43) Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44) Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
45) Adopted an accent for an entire day
46) Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47) Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48) Had two hard drives for your computer
49) Visited all 50 states of USA
50) Loved your job for all accounts
51) Taken care of someone who was shit faced
52) Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53) Had amazing friends
54) Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
55) Watched wild whales
56) Stolen a sign
57) Backpacked in Europe
58) Taken a road-trip
59) Rock climbing
60) Lied to foreign government’s official in that country to avoid notice
61) Midnight walk on the beach
62) Sky diving
63) Visited Ireland
64) Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love
65) In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
66) Visited Japan
67) Benchpressed your own weight
68) Milked a cow
69) Alphabetized your records
70) Pretended to be a superhero
71) Sung karaoke
72) Lounged around in bed all day
73) Posed nude in front of strangers
74) Scuba diving
75) Got it on to “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye
76) Kissed in the rain
77) Played in the mud
78) Played in the rain
79) Gone to a drive-in theater
80) Done something you should regret, but don’t regret it
81) Visited the Great Wall of China
82) Discovered that someone who’s not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog
83) Dropped Windows in favor of something better
84) Started a business
85) Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86) Toured ancient sites
87) Taken a martial arts class
88) Sword fought for the honor of a woman
89) Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
90) Gotten engaged
91) Been in a movie
92) Crashed a party
93) Loved someone you shouldn’t have
94) Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy
95) Gotten married
96) Had sex at the office
97) Gone without food for 5 days
98) Made cookies from scratch
99) Won first prize in a costume contest
100) Ridden a gondola in Venice
101) Gotten a tattoo
102) Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on
103) Gotten divorced
104) Been on television news programs as an “expert”
105) Got flowers for no reason
106) Masturbated in a public place
107) Got so drunk you don’t remember anything
108) Taken illegal drugs
109) Performed on stage
110) Been to Las Vegas
111) Recorded music
112) Eaten shark
113) Had a one-night stand
114) Gone to Thailand
115) Seen Siouxsie live
116) Bought a house
117) Been in a combat zone
118) Buried one/both of your parents
119) Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off
120) Been on a cruise ship
121) Spoken more than one language fluently
122) Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123) Bounced a check
124) Performed in Rocky Horror
125) Read - and understood - your credit report
126) Raised children
127) Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy
128) Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
129) Created and named your own constellation of stars
130) Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131) Found out something significant that your ancestors did
132) Called or written your Congress person
133) Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
134) …more than once? - More than twice?
135) Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136) Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
137) Had an abortion or your female partner did
138) Had plastic surgery
139) Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
140) Wrote articles for a large publication
141) Lost over 100 pounds
142) Held someone while they were having a flashback
143) Piloted an airplane
144) Petted a stingray
145) Broken someone’s heart
146) Helped an animal give birth
147) Been fired or laid off from a job
148) Won money on a T.V. game show
149) Broken a bone
150) Killed a human being
151) Gone on an African photo safari
152) Ridden a motorcycle
153) Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100 mph
154) Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155) Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
156) Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157) Ridden a horse
158) Had major surgery
159) Had sex on a moving train
160) Had a snake as a pet
161) Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162) Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
163) Slept for more than 30 hours
164) Visited lots of foreign countries
165) Visited all 7 continents
166) Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167) Eaten kangaroo meat
168) Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
169) Been a sperm or egg donor
170) Eaten sushi
171) Had your picture in the newspaper
172) Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173) Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
174) Gotten someone fired for their actions
175) Gone back to school
176) Parasailed
177) Changed your name
178) Petted a cockroach
179) Eaten fried green tomatoes
180) Read The Iliad
181) Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
182) Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183) …and gotten 86?ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184) Taught yourself an art from scratch
185) Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186) Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt
187) Skipped all your school reunions
188) Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
189) Been elected to public office
190) Written your own computer language
191) Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
192) Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193) Built your own PC from parts
194) Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
195) Had a booth at a street fair
196) Dyed your hair
197) Been a DJ
198) Found out someone was going to dump you via blog
199) Written your own role playing game
200) Been arrested

luni, 18 mai 2009


Multa lume nu intelege de ce astept Eurovisionu an de an cum il asteapta copiii pe Mos Craciun la gura sobei. Atata scandal, melodii gay si tricouri mulate, falseuri si mari dezamagiri, in combinatie cu sentimentu acut al checului de care sufera romanu de cand se stie : a fost blat! 

Desigur ca exista un joc geo-politic in care tarile scandinave si Azerbaidjan combinat cu San Marino, condus de un mastermind ca Malta al carui singur scop e sa ne rapeasca noua binemeritata glorie. Am avut RETETA : fata frumoasa+


                                                                        femei bune



                                                                         tobe pe banda

                                                                         Laurentiu Duta.

Check,check, check,check, check, check.

Asa ca de unde abia locu' 19?

Ce-i drept , la prima auditie si mie mi s-a parut o prestatie stearsa. Dar sa fim seriosi, comparativ cu alte prezente care m-au oripilat sau m-au lasat complet rece...cred ca se gasea un loc si pentru Elena Gheorghe, aceasta vestala declarata (cu fiecare ocazie).

Sa va dau cateva  exemple de melodii mult mai nasoale :

  •  Azerbaidjanu (locul III) : daca femeia aia nu era atat de buna si nu ar fi distras pe toata lumea ar fi luat fix jumatea lu' cinci. Care nu este 3.It sounded like Pepe on crack.
  • Armenia (locul X) : doua gemene siameze turbate, nevestele lu binladen, imbracate pana-n dinti ne zic noua sa shake and move our body.Yo Ya Yo.
  • Grecia (locul VII) ; deci cam cat de gay poti sa fii? cineva sa-i tricoteze juma de tricou, ca baiatu a fugit de la Materna.
  • Croatia (locul XVIII) :...what the fuck is Croatia anyway?

    Nu,nu am terminat- exista si melodii faine cantate execrabil live:

  • Rusia (locul XI) : incep sa cred ca  Blaxy Girls nu se faceau de ras pe langa fata asta
  • Turcia (locul IV) : ce melodie faina, ce ritm, ce spectacol. Help! She can't sing!

    Au fost si momente faine, asta fiind motivul pentru care pandesc eurovisionu in fiecare an. Anu trecut m-am ales pe player cu melodia  compusa de Dana International pentru Israel (Boaz Mauda)- As if here si cu Armenia (Sirusho- Quele Quele).

      Anul asta deja am incarcat-o pe Nelly Ciobanu (Moldova): e senzationala femeia, ce voce, ce prezenta, ce incarcatura. Ma buseste plansu si imi aduce aminte ca-s romanca.

Pe langa  Nelly Ciobanu, mi-a placut turcoaica, omitand faptul ca femeia nu poate sa cante live.

Alte melodii decente:

  • Islanda : femeia aia era ireal de frumoasa. Pacat ca bunica-mea la 68 de ani e imbracata mai bine ca ea.
  • Marea Britanie : atat am de zis- ce rochie!
  • Ucraina : that girl's got big balls 

Oameni buni, la ce va asteptati cand noi incercam sa vindem cioara vopsita? Europei i se ridica paru pe spate numai cand aude de Romania. Tarilor Balcanice probabil ca nu le-a picat prea bine faptu ca noi traim intre Carpati. Una peste alta, dincolo de legitimitatea geo-politica a tarii noastre, melodia a fost rasuflata, banala, coregrafia depasita, tocurile prea inalte si fumurile nejustificate.

Dar asta nu inseamna ca popogheiu  care a castigat, a si meritat asta. For chrissake, omu a facut playback la vioara, a afisat un fatau de provincial tamp pe tot parcursu melodiei, iar pe restu a racnit versuri stupide si fara noima : I'm in love with a fairytale, even though it's hard....

Sau vino in lumea barbie sa ne distram si sa ne jucam.

Cred ca oamenii aia din juriu, care au crescut cu un brontozaur in curte,ar trebui sa-si dea foc.

Oh well, pana la urma toate mizeriile de dinaintea, din timpul, si din urma concursului sunt mai bune decat concursul insusi.



Ce mizerie purulenta.Imi da un feeling a la  Eurovision, dar o sa o fac pentru ca tin sa gasesc orice motiv sa nu care cumva sa ma despart de monitor in urmatoarele 2 ore.Sa zicem ca sunt in vacanta- desi cautatu' de sandale pentru bal nu e niciodata in vacanta...

Here goes....luati-o si voi fratilor, daca v-o placea. Am vazut-o la Woland ,care la randu-i a capatat-o de la Gia

SUNT mai plictisita si mai lenesa decat prevede legea.
AS VREA sa imi iau 3 luni numai penntru mine.
PASTREZ pixuri  terminate/ defecte.multe.
MI-AS FI DORIT sa port pantaloni scurti.
NU IMI PLACE  cand eu te caut si tu nu auzi telefonu in timp util.
MA TEM ca n-o sa ma schimb niciodata.
AUD  ce muzica asculti la casti in metrou sau  peste 6 banci in biblioteca.
IMI PARE RAU  ca se termina de fiecare data inainte sa inceapa cu adevarat,
IMI PLAC pisicile.
NU SUNT optimista.
DANSEZ  in weekend si oricum, mult mai putin decat as vrea.
NICIODATA  nu am suficient timp, desi nu fac nimic cu ala de care dispun.
RAR imi tin gura in prezenta snobilor si a ipocritilor.
PLANG intotdeauna la melodii cu  puternice influente etnice.
NU SUNT INTOTDEAUNA  dispusa sa te ascult, chiar daca te-ai obisnuit cu asta.
NU IMI PLACE DE MINE  cand injur.
SUNT CONFUZ (A) cand  traiesc in disconfort termic.
AM NEVOIE de foarte putin. 
AR TREBUI sa vorbesc mai putin si sa pun osu' mai mult.

duminică, 10 mai 2009

Reggaeton sau cum sa te freci

Din descendenta muzicilor de tip rafaga,mariposa,munequita in combinatie cu un maidan maxican, s-a presarat ceva boricua( de Puerto Rico, obvio!) daca v-a placut cubatonu' sau cu chifla, si s-a nascut acest copil din flori al muzicii de discoteca sud-americana.

Multi il numesc vulgar, degradant,kama sutra pe manele.Si da, presupune un dans murdar. 

Dar eu tin sa raman la punctul meu de vedere : n-ai cum sa intelegi ca sa iti poti da cu parerea din moment ce nu dispui de un minim de cunostinte de limbaj suburban de favela. De unde l-ai prins, de la sclava izaura sau din calatorii la locu' faptei, nu e treaba mea.

Intotdeauna m-a incitat argou' sud-american; poate pentru ca e plastic dar necrutator. Poate ca e sangele care colcaie in ei sau modul in care fetele isi folosesc ce-au ele mai bun si mai copt. Limba  aia ascutita,that is.Imi place ca sunt furiosi si nu vor sa fie luati cu usurelu.

Si nu, nu cred ca realitatea aia de mahala de chirpici e atat de departe de noi.Cred ca in aroganta noastra de continentali batrani ne vrem superiori.Si atunci gasim pretexte sa ne supra-apreciem ca natie, in conditiile in care mai bine de 3/4 din populatia Romaniei  l-ar vota maine pe Guta Presedinte.


Eu as zice mai bine brut, animalic, sexual , primitiv , necenzurat, corp la corp, transpiratie, hormoni, pradatorul si prada, supunere si dominare.

Tot cacatu ala bun.

And let's not forget: it will definetly improve your sex life. Money back guaranteed.

Si acu o portie de Argentina (* e a doua echipa...ecuador si romania sunt o mizerie purulenta-ala da reggaeton sa-ti bagi copiii in facultate) , ca sa nu fi fost in zadar gargara asta la ceas tarziu. 

miercuri, 6 mai 2009

Why should I care?

In my life

Why do I give valuable time

To people who don't care if I live or die?

sâmbătă, 2 mai 2009


even today
we found a treasure
we found the masks
but nothing of what was found here
will be sent-away
or fall in wrong hands

(inscriptie gasita pe peretele unui azil de nebuni parasit)


Incep cu o constatare specifica bloggerului frustrat si profund neoriginal in neputinta lui de a scrie ceva cu seva si proteine si toate chestiile alea bune din care sunt facute visele: de cand nu am mai scris....!!!!

Pentru prima data sunt singura intr-o camera de camin. N-am simtit asa aer rarefiat de libertate de cand ma stiu.Sunt tanara si lipsita de perspective.Sunt fun si sunt penibil de consolata cu viata mea.

Am vazut un blockbuster fetid  acum cateva zile in care cineva spunea ca trebuie sa fii "the leading lady of your own life".
Se fura curent la greu,evident.

Eroii sunt supraestimati.

I wanna be the Robin in my life.

Gasesc voluptate in a fi femeia-ghips.Cea care umple crapaturile si netezeste tegumentele.Un fel de Neutrogena fara tub in zilele geroase lipsite de fiorduri.

I don't mind the harmony of waters
I'm looki
ng nothing but dissonances
more than perfection
crossing the narrow arch
that I know


                                                                     (S. Quasimodo)